Forgiveness

How do we forgive the people we don't want to forgive? This is a question I often ask myself. Do you ever get tired of forgiving? I do! Do I often have to ask for forgiveness? No I don't. That's because 99.9% of the time I think before I speak and act. When it comes to David that is a different story. I find myself apologizing to him alot and vice versa. But it's the other people that rub me the wrong way that I can't handle. Why does (nameless) tell me all the time that my friends are lame? Why does (nameless) always show up late and act like it's no big deal eventhough I've driven 2 hours to get there and am there on time? Why does (nameless) think it's ok to use me and never repay me with kindness? I didn't do things for her because I wanted something in return, but when it was my turn I wanted something. Why does (nameless) call me every single day and talk about nothing? Have I outgrown my friends? Is it wrong for me to want to spend quality time with David and blow off my friends? How do I navigate without feeling guilty? It's all a puzzle, and while I am in search of answers every day, I can't stop being friends with people I am hurt and bothered by. I guess some day I will be able to lead a guilt free life, but for now I have to go because the phone is ringing and it's (nameless) calling to tell me about her dull boring weekend. God help me please.